Let me ask you a question: what will be better in your life when you are free from porn? What is just one thing that will be better?
If I may, stop what you're doing right now and think about this for a second.
When you are living a life of freedom, when you are in a place where you have built the skill to handle that urge to watch porn, what is one way your life will be better?
Take a look at the list I came up with below as a starting point. Some of these may resonate with you, some may not. Come up with a few (or many) of your own.
You all of a sudden have more time (maybe WAY more time) to do things that are engaging, life-giving, productive, or just fun!
You feel a continual sense of real victory, triumph, fulfillment. This replaces that feeling of shame for not being able to beat this thing.
That constant fear of being found out? It's gone.
You can look your wife in the eyes again.
If you choose, you are in a position now to help other guys in your life that struggle with porn (remember, statistically, most of the guys you interact with view porn on a regular basis, and struggle with shame, guilt and fear of being found out).
You are in control of your time, your actions, your choices rather than being mastered by the urge. You are back in the driver's seat of your life.
Every once in a while you will be in a situation where you stop and say to yourself, "Wow, not that long ago if I were in this same situation, I would definitely be watching porn right now. I can't believe I'm actually free!"
You no longer have that "secret," that side of you that you are constantly hiding. The result? You become a more whole, integrated, authentic man.
That sense of feeling defeated, hopeless, is replaced with a real sense of confidence. Because you overcame a difficult and long struggle that most men don't overcome.
This all sounds pretty good, doesn't it? How did I come up with this list? Because this is what I experience on a regular basis. After struggling with porn for literally decades, I can describe to you what it feels like on the "other side." And I desperately want you to experience this too. And I know you can. How can I know that? Because I did it, and I am not any smarter or stronger than you. I just happened to stumble on a plan that actually works. And I committed to it until it led me into the fresh air of freedom. So now, choose one "better thing" that resonates with you the most. Take that one better thing with you this week. Let it pull you. Let it fuel you. Let it motivate you to implement the P.A.T.H. Plan this week. To practice in advance. To not give up when it feels clunky. To commit and believe that freedom is possible for you. Because I know it is. -Dan
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